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New decade

I think the lapband people call it "being at a new decade". I have seem the same two digits on the scale for over a year and today I finally see a different Set. Well the first digit didn't change but the tens digit has.

Several things have gotten together to make the change. First the unfill - I am getting more comfortable with food and rating everyday.

The second is a bad tooth. It broke labor day weekend, I had a root canal and am with a temporary crown. Right now is the most uncomfortable I have been. I can't chew well but I am dealing with that better than the tossing up food. It does not cause a binge of mushies.

Finally changing my exercise routine. I have been at the gym almost everyday since the physical therapist convinced me to sell my treadmill and join a gym and switch to stationary bike. Okay that is really the reverse of what happened nut you get the point.

By the way the knee has been pretty good. I had a lock up during a walk through at agility yesterday but it hasn't kept me from running. However I still have a lot of pain and stiffness in the surrounding muscles.

Why I am still depressed

Other than a possible diabetes complication of depression, I know that I am still depressed and unhappy with my life.

Fit4D helped me figure it out completely, but I have been suspecting it for some time. 

It’s the lapband.  I’m going to try an unfill Monday, IF I get a half day sub.  Right now, the sub system is down, and when I checked last night, I didn’t have one.

I am so restricted on what I can eat right now it isn’t funny.  I can’t eat solid food before around 2:00 pm, and there isn’t much food I can eat of the solid variety.  At lot of this is due to the school year, this week was awful and I still have to write an email about it, solving the problem.

The following foods are completely out:

    • pork (though I can do sausage if I avoid the skins)
    • most beef
    • fried or grilled chicken
    • vegetables
    • fruit

With the exception of anything that is cooked in a sauce.  Notice I didn’t say sauce added, though that can help.

I cough food up on a regular basis, no matter how slow I eat.  Coughing food up isn’t pretty and probably isn’t good for me.

What really triggered things was the Fit4D people bitching about what I was eating.  The phone call from the coach was very negative along with the emails.  To continue with them I had to set some boundaries because the depression is worse.  I’m on the verge of tears even writing this.

I honestly can’t eat any of their suggestions.

Day 12 after the Surgery

Yesterday was hard. Woke up feeling a bit off, and stayed that way most of the day.  Now I think I was constipated but I'm so rarely in that state didn't realize what was wrong. 

We had our baby shower for the Associate Principal for Instruction (we used to call them the Dean).  She had her baby before the originally scheduled shower -- and they had lots of food.  I could have eaten queso or dip but nothing they brought for the dip so there didn't see much point.  They also had little sandwiches and cake, but couldn't eat any of that.

Didn't get to leave until at 4:00 pm -- that's for the other blog, later on today.

People have asked me how I feel -- physically I'm better than I was before the surgery -- I have ankles again.  Mentally, I just don't know yet -- I'm still in the initial healing stages and still on liquid diet.  I tell people ask me in six months how I feel about the surgery.  Right now it's all too new.

Dog agility went MUCH better last night.  I actually ran and there was a definite improvement in both dogs.  I need to lose at least another 25 pounds before it gets good enough to trial.

Still at 11 pounds since surgery but TDD was 37 yesterday.

I also need to get better at dosing insulin and on taking Symlin.